She's the Type of Girl You Marry
I'm not really sure what that means. But it immediately asks, what Types of girls are there you don't marry? Then that weird song comes into my head, "She's the kind of girl you don't take home to mother." Do people still think this way? Does my lover think this way?
Type of Girl...
Type of Girl...
What is a Type of Girl anyway?
And what scares me more, the idea that I am possibly closer to not taking home to mother or that a friend of mine can be neatly categorized this way, that women can be categorized this way? Or that my lover has Types in his head? Ideas of what a "good woman" is, ideas I have never come close to?
What do you do with other Types of girls? What are these other Types of girls? Why would you be with one that has no potential for the future?
Am I some Type of girl? Do people look at me and think of short term pleasures that they would never take too far?
I've heard about how some men think, things they've told boys, but these things, I thought they went out with racism. "Go fuck as many sluts as you can, then find a nice virgin to marry, son." Do people still think this way? Does my own lover have some modified version of this in his mind?
What Type of Girl am I?
Am I a pit stop? A weekend in Las Vegas?
It's not like I am out cruisinig for a husband or anything of that nature, but I've never spent any serious amount of time with someone who I didn't percieve to at least be a potential mate. And as I've gotten older, I've gotten better about not getting tangled up at all with people I know I have no possible future with.
Oh, this divide between how I see the world and how others see it.
Am I a fixer-upper? A Lost Cause? A diversion?
Am I the type of girl you don't take home to mother?
How would I know?
posted by january girl @ 12:10 PM
5 Comments:
Your "type" will depend a lot on your partner of the moment. Your ex, I believe, perceived you as a fixer-upper. As far as I can tell that was a big part of the problem between you two (I hope you don't mind the impertinence of me discussing it here). It's doubful your current paramour has the same problem.
I think before worrying too much about this you should do some research as to exactly what Mr. James (RIP) was refering to when he uttered said words.
http://www.twin-music.com/azlyrics/j_file/rickjames.html
Sis: I appreciate the implication that he has any sort of problem with me at all, as if that's a given, as if he must necessarily have some sort of problem with me.
It's funny, because, as opposed to my ex who constantly told me I was crazy, he has told me I am not crazy and there isn't anything wrong with me.
I'm not constantly criticized and measured anymore, though I expect to be for some odd fucking reason. To be honest, I imagine his comment about our friend was just an offhand remark because she is a really cool person and we were discussing our friends' relationship. His comment just got me thinking about alot of things, so I wrote it all out. And of course, I still feel strange since he told me in the beginning that I wasn't what he wanted, but in all fairness, he said alot of incongruous shit back then.
I mean, I was a pretty big mess when he met me (don't know why). There was good reason to be leary of me.
But there is nothing wrong with me. I am who I am, and if I don't like things, I can try to change them, and it's damn fucking nice to not have someone down my throat, judging me every fucking second of the day, telling me what I should be doing.
Basically, I'm saying, Go fuck yourself Ben with all your judgements of me and your inability to cope with the fact that I am with someone who treats me really well, who can accept my flaws and not harp on them, who appreciates me as a person and isn't trying to turn me into someone else he finds more palatable.
Go fuck your googly-eyed, dine and dashing bimbo. You finally found someone more worthy of your greatness than I.
Touchy touchy. I think it was you who implied that "[your] lover" had some kind of problem with you; I apologize for any unwarranted implications in my comment. As for your comments about Ben, I decline to speculate on how he feels about your current relationship, or on his behavior when you were together, or really anything else. (After all, I have only your two perspectives to work with here, and the longer you two are apart the further your recollections diverge.) Although it seems like kind of a cheap shot to rag on his current... whatever. So if you want to flame me, or him scream FYAD to the heavens for all I care; but just remember this: every man you've been with for any length of time started off swell and then, slowly but inexorably became the embodyment of all that is wrong with the XY half of the species--a pattern to be wary of. Of course, I do hope that doesn't happen again.
just in case my physical convulsing and vomit breath made me less than convincing: i generally support the idea of people w/o penises spending time w one another and specifically am up for coffee/beer with you whenever.
217-721-7773
ejackso4@uiuc.edu
-your very own googly-eyed dine/dashing bimbo (though i do prefer "bimbette")
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